Gathering Flowers Along The Way
Updated: Jun 29, 2021
A mere coincidence or not? Born June 10th, 1982 in a fully diverse community of people from all around the world. From the time I was in my mother’s womb I listened to many languages such as Thai, different dialects of Chinese, German, Italian, and others I'm sure. My mother herself speaking different languages with her voice and with her hands. I was born with a higher purpose that I'm sure of. The day my mother had me she had been waitressing at a restaurant called Chop Sticks. She left work and proceeded to her favorite place to eat. She had steak, baked potato, salad, and a piece of cheesecake. When she was done there she proceeded to the hospital for a scheduled ultrasound at 3 pm. There she discovered she was in labor. She hadn't planned on having me that day but somehow it just worked out that way. I was born at 3:36 p.m. I was born weeks earlier than expected. I was ready. There was a whole world outside of my mother’s womb that was calling me. I was eager to get started on my journey.
Beauty entailed. At 2 years old in Fort Bragg, North Carolina I participated in a beauty contest and won the title of Little Miss Fort Bragg. This was a start to exploring modeling as throughout the years up to about 16 or 17 I would attend John Casablancas, other agencies, and meet with professional photographers for photoshoots. At 17 years old something happened inside of me. I began to compare myself to the others. This would end my journey into modeling but reawaken my soul’s journey that may have been just why I was here in the first place. Looking within. Something I had always done since a small child was to spend time outside in Nature. From taking walks in the woods, building forts in my backyard, fishing on the banks of the Cape Fear River, four-wheeling on trails in both North and South Carolina, and spending all-nighters on the beach while my dad fished on the pier. Not to mention learning how to shoot a gun at a family friend-owned shooting range before the age of 12. Having these experiences felt fulfilling. And yet still there was so much more out there still to be discovered.
Leaving what I knew behind to explore what existed outside of my parent’s embrace. I moved to the banks of North Carolina, a place I was very familiar with. There was something in the air there that felt invigorating. I would work multiple jobs, meeting many people, I explored the life of having wealth and wealthy friends only to just give it all away as if it didn’t even matter. The act of giving came so naturally to me. I think that is what attracted people to me, as I radiated a giving & loving heart. A year would pass where I found myself still looking inwards knowing there's something more. I walked, did yoga, and danced on the beach. I kept telling myself to let go. Let go of fear, of being judged, and of walking away from everything in search of finding something that I just didn't quite know how to describe that was nameless. Something exists out there and I'm going to find it. This is what I told myself.
From the east coast to the west. I lived in Southern California for 4 years. The mauve desert need I say more? It was different and the difference was extraordinary. I had my first 2 children while living there. So much knowledge and experience was bestowed upon me on the path of motherhood. The time waiting to give birth, the time in pain during the contractions, and the joys of having these new lives within the grasp of my arms nestled against my heart. I missed my own mother and began a deeper more profound respect and relationship with her. At the end of the 4 years, I knew I was going to move but I didn't know where. I bought an Italian easel, and acrylic paints off eBay. When all was quiet I set up my easel, canvas, and paints. I remember beginning at what am I going to paint. So I decided to let go and just paint in the moment whatever was natural. I end up painting a mountain/cliff with a waterfall. This would end up being extremely significant later on. Strangely after painting that waterfall, I had an incredibly powerful dream. I was surrounded by Native Americans. They were all dressed traditionally headdresses and all. They blew their smoke from their peace pipes on me and then opened up a path showing me the way. I felt northeast but I didn’t know any more than that. I ended up getting stationed in Wisconsin. It definitely felt like a stop along the way and nothing more. That story was about painting, it was about finding strength in myself, and it was about moving forward and not looking back.
From Wisconsin to a suburb in Chicago. In Chicago, I had to make choices. I had been pushed away from evil and that was a good thing because ultimately I was destined for much more. I painted, I wrote, and I sought out a spiritual teacher. A Jewish man who taught me what I was, what I felt in my soul was beautiful, and that I had been on the right path for most of my life without even knowing it to the fullest degree. Again I would have another dream that would wake me with a fast-beating heart and some kind of message or knowledge being bestowed upon me. I dreamt I was walking along a path in the woods, there was a stream, and there was something extremely important about this stream. I woke, called my mom with heightened energy, Mom! I’m meant to do something with water… This stream is extremely important. Only time would tell. I picked a place on the map. I was ready to settle in somewhere. Although there was the challenge of being a single mother I was going to overcome the challenges and meet my soul's purpose.
New York made me stronger than I could have ever imagined. I had never been happier and I felt a sense of belonging. I met my husband on the cusp of the wind blowing us in each other’s direction. It felt surreal. If you could imagine meeting someone that filled your soul with wonder and curiosity. How did you get here, where did you come from, and it's taken so long to find you. It was truly beautiful. This path has awakened my soul and has surrounded me with unconditional love. I would give birth to another beautiful child who would reawaken the little dreamy girl within me. I would encounter other spiritual people like myself, another deep desire that I had longed for for so long. I would meet my best friend on the cusp of the wind blowing our meeting in each other’s direction again knowing that these happenings are with great purpose.
From an infant in my mother’s womb ready to start my journey. I explored, I ventured, I led with my heart. This journey inwards led me from painting a waterfall in the kitchen in southern California to picking a place on the map, Niagara Falls, New York. I would meet my soulmate now husband. I would manifest a walk along a sacred stream celebrating a beautiful friendship that just somehow felt significant many years prior. Without even knowing all of this would come to be or did I know in some other way that is being expressed without words and that is nameless. Coincidence or not? No matter what I gathered flowers along the way.
Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous, says Albert Einstein.
The Magic Of Wisteria
Written by Nicole Angeli Corso